In case you aren't aware, I work in the office at an apartment complex and run about 400 units.
Seriously. It happens all the time, and it's always the creepers. It's kind of an inside joke at my office. I have one guy that knows my schedule and comes in or calls almost every day under the guise that he needs something apartment related, only to chat about music/life/etc., and as nicely as I can I have to constantly find different ways to remove myself from the conversation.
Here is my most recent interaction.
A guy came into my office looking for a 1 bedroom. We'll call him Jim. Because that's his name. As I began to help him, he explained that the apartment was for him and his girlfriend. So naturally, as I am explaining the rental process to him I explained that his girlfriend would need to come in to fill out some paperwork as well.
A few minutes into this, he says, "Well, she's not really my girlfriend."
Red Flag #1. ...Because he just got finished telling me that he would be living with his girlfriend.
Anyway, he was kind of (I say kind of because I usually don't catch onto the fact that a guy is flirting with me) flirting with me. Of course I chose to ignore it.
He's 60, by the way. Yep. Born in 1951- I just checked.
He was asking me what I was doing on my weekend, and feeling uncomfortable I said a really stupid thing:
"I'm not sure. The world is my oyster."
This isn't stupid because I shouldn't have said it, it's just a really stupid phrase. Which speaks to how uncomfortable and awkward this was. I forget what he said exactly, but he made some kind of comment and thought it was hilarious. Which is odd, because it's in no way funny.
I sent him this email in order to get the ball rolling with the rental:
Go ahead and have Carol (GIRLFRIEND) sign these 3 forms and fill out the app and send everything back to me along with her photo ID.
Short and sweet. And this is what I get in response.
morgan your wish is my command, lol see you this afternoon. you r sweet.
So....awesome. i m sweet. This might be something I would have expected from a 12 year old girl via text, but not from a 60 year old man during a business transaction via email. Of course I didn't respond. To Red Flag #2. And of course, I immediately forwarded the hilarious email to my boyfriend.
And then it was my weekend. So I had 2 days to make the world my oyster. When I came back into work, I came back to this:
Welcome back from your Days off Morgan. Hoping my email catches you bright eyed and rested. Once you hunker down you should find everything you requested has been faxed on over too you. because friday the 18 th seems to be sneaking up on us rather quickly. I would like you to keep me informed as to when our application has been approved and were set to proceed to moving in on friday. Hopefully this will not create any undue stress on you. been thinkin bout the world is your oster comment the other day. I like that thanks for your help you been great. Jim
Seems friendly enough, but freaking weird and creepy. And I cut and pasted these emails so these are exactly what they said. I responded to his email:
hi Morgan how were your days off? got yout messageabout everythingbeing good soI guess look for us around noon tommorrow. Regarding the apt. insurance the agent said he was going to fax you acopy of the policy. All the other numbers that you requested were included in the applications. Many thanks again hoping to see you soon. stiill thinking bout the world being your osyter. does that as well make you a peril diver. teasing!
Him: It's a cat.