Thursday, January 27, 2011

Moving/Special Cat(s) Update

Well, it's finished.  Not the unpacking, but at least all my crap is in one place, and I am done with my Dana Point apartment.  I am beyond exhausted.  My wrist hurts, my back hurts...and I simultaneously want to unpack everything and nothing...ever.  I can live out of boxes and bags, right?

My cats are...adjusting?

Large Cat is having a lot of trouble with my new windows. 

Go on, you say?  Don't mind if I do!

The window in my DP bedroom had a sill on which one or two cats could comfortably sit and peer out at passers by and the running waters of the stream below.

New apartment is different.  There is a smaller window which actually has 3 panes of glass in order to cut down on noise (which I find unnecessary, it's not that loud?).  So here is the problem:

When the window is open, Large Cat can jump and barely (she's fat) sit on the tiny lip of the window sill.  BUT when the window is closed, the sill disappears.  And so does the ability for her to sit on it.

This is very confusing to a cat. 

The first time it happened I was laying in bed, exhausted from moving. I heard the blinds clatter and looked over in time to see her falling to the ground after a failed attempt to perch in the window.  "Aww poor Large Cat.  She'll figure it out."

She didn't. 

Attempt number two occurred about a minute and a half later.  Same result.  Epic cat fail.  Now it was getting sad.

The shock finally subsided and I went back to doing nothing.

About three minutes later I heard the blinds again follow by a loud thud....on the other side of the window.  Also unsuccessful.  Large Cat figured out that the right side of the window was clearly unavailable, but the left side had to work.  She was wrong.  And fell to the ground defeated.

She has done the same to my windows in my living room.  I am worried that her brain cells are rapidly decreasing with every fail.  It's like headbanging for cats.  Except without music.  And more running into windows with your head.  And it will make her stupider, which I don't need.  (If I can add photos later by being evil and waiting for her to fail, I will.)

<-------- :(  -Large Cat

Special Cat is having issues too (obviously).  With my ceiling fans. 

There is one in the bedroom and one in the living room.  I didn't understand why this was such a problem until I realized that my DP apartment did not have ceiling fans.  Special Cat is only about 6 months old and has only known the DP apartment.  So ceiling fans are an entirely new monster to her.

She spends a lot of time on the ground, and then on my bed, and then on the ground, and back on the bed, looking at the ceiling with her head cocked to one side, as if to say, "What, the, FUCK, is that???"

But she doesn't really say that.  Because she's a cat. 

What she does do is make all kinds of strange meowing (if you could call it that?) sounds that sound really sad and concerned.  I think she thought she knew everything there was to know, and I just threw a cog into that machine.  And her tiny little Special mind has been blown.

<-----  ???WTF??? -Special Cat

Finally, an update on my Dickhole neighbor.

I am sorry to report that things didn't work out the way I planned and I ran out of time. 

1.  I love Tuesday night trivia at Kitsch Bar way more than I hate my neighbor.  So there went that night. 

2.  Wednesday I didn't have help so I spent the whole day finishing getting stuff out of the old place and cleaning.

3.  Then I had to give my landlord the keys right then and there.


BUT.  I am happy to report that the entire 5 hours I was in there finishing up and cleaning,  I listened to music at an inappropriate volume.  I listened to things like, Marilyn Manson, Ke$ know, things I love but that would be annoying as hell to hear through a ceiling.  And I wore high heeled boots on the hardwood floor.  And he was home the whole time. 

I also left for an hour to go run and do a few things, turned the volume up, and left.  So that was great. 

And I do still work 2 minutes from where he lives.  And I do have the advantage of knowing where he lives and him not knowing where I moved to.

And if anyone feels so inclined, please, for the love of God, go and mess with him.

Dickhole Neighbor
33852 Del Obispo St Unit 109
Dana Point, CA 92629

The gate code is #1414. 
And you all know what his van looks like. 

Have fun and take pictures!!!!!

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