Top 5 Types of Shitty Friends

Let's face it:  Not all friends are good friends. 

The older I get I realize that there are only a handful of people that I am really close to.  I know some people prefer to be a psuedo-friend to a large number of people, but that's just not for me.  I would rather give all of myself to a small group and in return have a smaller number of really great friends.  Sure there are a lot of others along the way, and they all serve their purpose,  but then there are a lot of those people who just...

...suck.

So here is my list of the Top 5 Types of Shitty Friends...in my experience of course.

5. The Faux Friend

This is the friend that you will never get close to.  It's impossible.  Perhaps they are incapable of forming a relationship that's deeper than the surface.  The kind of person that you can almost see the words that you are speaking go in one ear and out the.  They are the red party cup of the friendship world:  Their presence means it's time to party.  And that's pretty much where it ends.

My Take:  You can try to make this relationship meaningful, but it will be to no avail.  Cut your losses, or just enjoy them for the facade they are.  Cause it's party time.


4. The Shit-Talker

This one's pretty obvious.  This is the friend that is super cool to your face, but then talks mad shit as soon as you turn your back.  You can even call them out on it or catch them doing it, but they have a way of turning it around to prove their "innocence."  Or maybe just one day they decide you're not friends anymore and start treating you badly, unbeknownst to you.  Regardless, it's lame.  And they're not real friends.

My Take:  Make up your mind. 

Either be a good friend, or be a bad friend.  Because honestly, I don't have time for your bullshit.  And I have people in my life who are more deserving and capable of a reciprocal friendship.

3. The Complaining Friend

This is the friend that never has anything positive to say.  Ever.  Their life is always in turmoil and they are always about to throw themselves off a cliff.  You can talk them down, but you know tomorrow they'll be right back in Dramaland.  Friends are there for a reason.  And as a female, sometimes bitching and moaning to your female friends is very necessary.  BUT, there is a time and a place.  Oh...and this friend probably only talks about himself/herself. 

My Take:   You will drain the life force from your friends if you are this person all of the time.  Avoid (consistently) becoming this friend at all cost! 

2. The Loch Ness Friend

This is the friend that surfaces only when they are single.  It's like a Loch Ness Monster sighting...very rare.  Also predictable.  When they are happily in a relationship, you will pretty much never hear from them.  Ever.  You might try to hang out with them every once in a while, but it will almost always fail.  And if you do finally track them down for long enough to go get coffee, they will probably be texting their significant other the whole time.

My Take:  Relationships happen!  Naturally, you grow closer to your significant other and spend less time with your friends.  Totally normal.  What's not normal is disappearing for stretches of time (conveniently the times when you're dating someone) and then popping back up when you're single.

It is very easy to avoid becoming this type of shitty friend.  If you are in a relationship, all you have to do is keep in contact with your friends!  A phone call, a text even.  Try to make it a point to see your friends sometimes.  Because your friends know that when your relationship comes crashing down, they will be the ones picking up the pieces.  And if you've been completely MIA for the past year, that's totally lame.

1. The Flaky Friend

There is nothing I hate more than someone who constantly flakes.  Pretty much all of my friends know this about me already and if they have to flake, it's usually attached to an, "I'm sorry to flake!"  And I know, life happens, and sometimes you just need to flake.  But if flaking is a habit, then you're probably not someone I want in my life. 

My Take:  Well really, my take is don't flake.  If you say you're going to be somewhere, be there.  However, life happens.  I am aware of this.  So if you flake, at least acknowledge/apologize that you are flaking and make sure you don't flake for the rescheduling of said plans.

In Conclusion:

I swear I'm not a bitch, I'm just being honest.  I will admit I'm not completely innocent of all of these, but I'm usually pretty aware when I am doing one of these things and I try (and will continue to try) my best to remedy that immediately.

I am happy to say I am extremely blessed to have the people in my life that I do.  I've got some really great friends with really great hearts, and I wouldn't change that for the world. 



<-----"Let's be friends!"